Jason says "read this blog!"
Just when I'm about to sign the DNR papers for this blog something comes along and inspires me to write another post. One of these days Jason Segel will come to his senses and beg me to befriend him. I just hope he isn't waiting to see the 365th reason. It may take years.

365 Reasons Why...An Explanation

Well, hello there (said in a very sexy voice). You're looking quite lovely today. Welcome to my blog. Feel free to take off your shoes and get comfortable, maybe leave a comment or two. This started out as kind of a funny thing to do after I blew a phone conversation with Jason, but I've found I really enjoy writing every day and researching new and interesting things about my future BFF. In January I met Jason at a comedy club and the few words we shared only reinforced my belief that he and I would get along famously. As a dear friend of mine recently said, "why wouldn't he want to be friends with you - you're awesome!" Perhaps the 365 reasons in this blog may just convince Jason of what I already know to be true: separately, our awesomeness is great; combined, it may be enough to take over the world. If you want to be one of my esteemed followers, simply click on the 'follow' button toward the bottom of the page. Come on, you know you want to.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Reason 300

Psychic connection. A few days ago I woke up with a dopey grin on my face as I attempted to cling to the last wisps of a delightful dream I had about my clandestine BFF. That's right, Jason, you and I were traipsing around Disneyland, enjoying all of the rides and over-priced souvenir shops, with nary a pesky fan interrupting our perfect blue-sky-and-sunshine day with requests for pictures or autographs. To be honest I was quite surprised that my subconscious was conjuring you up. It isn't that my cerebral cortex doesn't adore you, Jason, whether it is light outside or not, but rather that my brain has been occupied with other things the last few months, like planning a wedding, writing oodles of thank you cards, starting back to work, and berating my uterus for being too old and crotchety to properly house a fetus. Oh, the joys of being 35. Anyway, as lovely as my dream was it was all but forgotten by the time I arrived at work where 75 tweens were waiting with bated breath for my lesson on reading disabilities (I killed it, by the way). It wasn't until the next evening when my dear friend Tamara posted an article on my Facebook page that I realized why my subconscious had been acting up. It turns out that you had flown into my great city with your current squeeze, the very talented Michelle Williams (I totally approve), the very day that I dreamed about you. Shock and awe! The only conclusion I could draw after hearing such news was that we have some kind of psychic connection, especially since your first order of business in Seattle was to stop by Cupcake Royale, which is hands my favorite cupcake place in the area. I hope you enjoyed a Triple Threat for me. Since you are such a magnanimous guy you posed for a photo with two of the employees and that picture made its way to the blogosphere where Tamara happened upon it and immediately alerted me of your presence ( Jason with the lovely cupcake crew). I am thrilled that you finally made your way north to the Emerald City since the first time we chatted you admitted to never having been here, but I do admit to being a tad perturbed that you didn't track me down after the strong case I have built for our friendship. Lucky for you I forgive fairly easily. Much like an elephant, however, I rarely forget, so next time you're in Seattle I fully expect you to invite me out for a cupcake or I may be forced to find a new bosom to buddy up to. Consider yourself warned, Jason Segel.