Jason says "read this blog!"
Just when I'm about to sign the DNR papers for this blog something comes along and inspires me to write another post. One of these days Jason Segel will come to his senses and beg me to befriend him. I just hope he isn't waiting to see the 365th reason. It may take years.



365 Reasons Why...An Explanation

Well, hello there (said in a very sexy voice). You're looking quite lovely today. Welcome to my blog. Feel free to take off your shoes and get comfortable, maybe leave a comment or two. This started out as kind of a funny thing to do after I blew a phone conversation with Jason, but I've found I really enjoy writing every day and researching new and interesting things about my future BFF. In January I met Jason at a comedy club and the few words we shared only reinforced my belief that he and I would get along famously. As a dear friend of mine recently said, "why wouldn't he want to be friends with you - you're awesome!" Perhaps the 365 reasons in this blog may just convince Jason of what I already know to be true: separately, our awesomeness is great; combined, it may be enough to take over the world. If you want to be one of my esteemed followers, simply click on the 'follow' button toward the bottom of the page. Come on, you know you want to.



Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Reason 289

Deadlines. For those of you who have been keeping track, today marks the anniversary of my phone chat with a very talented, handsome, Muppet-loving gentleman who answers to the name Jason Segel. The morning after that awkward conversation I started this blog in an attempt to convince Mr. Funny Pants we should be friends. If all had gone according to plan (and let's be honest, nothing ever does), this would be my 365th post. I would have faithfully shared reason after reason with my adoring public (or at least my fawning parents and supportive friends), reaching the one-year milestone with a blissful smile on my face and Jason seated on my comfy couch, bowl of popcorn in his lap, ready to watch The Muppets Take Manhattan. Alas, I have not been as dedicated in recent months as I once was, neglecting my bid for friendship in favor of more worthwhile pursuits like cringe-worthy first dates and eyeballing the filth in my bathroom with disdain. I did, however, over the course of the year manage to act like a complete dolt in front of Jason three times and squeal with girlish glee when he posted a comment on this very blog, which only reinforced my unhealthy ambition of becoming Segel's bosom buddy (1980's drag outfits and cheesy sitcom script not necessary). Looks like stalking has some benefits, afterall. Despite my recent apathetic approach to wooing you, Jason, I still strongly believe we'd get along like gangbusters, and since you're so hip I know you'll forgive me for letting the deadline for completing this blog whoosh by me like air between a certain blonde celebutante's ears. In my 33 years of living I've learned the importance of flexibility; the world will not come to a crashing end if every single deadline isn't adhered to, especially those we set for ourselves. Once we're thick as thieves, Jason, I'll happily remind you of this any time you're up against a deadline and your agent is breathing down your neck. Life is too short to be slaving away at a keyboard, cranking out new pages for what's sure to be Carrot Top's comeback movie. I'll even forgive you if you neglect some friend-related due date. Just don't forget my birthday or there will be hell to pay. We Leos do not like to be ignored.

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