Stress. I read an article recently (from an actual newspaper - how quaint!) about the top 10 most stressful places in the country to live and your hometown, Jason, topped the list at number two. You should move up north immediately before you develop an ulcer or suffer a stress-related heart attack. Seattle didn't make the list, probably because the constant rain lulls us into an apathetic stupor, rendering the actual emotion of stress useless. Besides, it's practically impossible to burst a blood vessel when you're surrounded by gorgeous snow-capped mountains, crisp blue water, and acres upon acres of lush greenery. The opportunity to mainline caffeine every few feet in any given neighborhood probably doesn't hurt either. If you do decide to throw off the shackles of L.A. living in pursuit of a healthier life and relocate to Seattle, Jason, I bet I could talk my mom into letting you crash at her place until you decompress and get your bearings. You'd have the entire basement to yourself, including access to the wrapping paper room and the largest collection of plastic Ziploc containers this side of the Mississippi. My mom also makes amazing lasagna and cookies that are almost as epic as mine. How can you resist? I bet you could get a lot of writing done in my childhood home - at least until I get off work and whisk you away for fun and excitement in the big city. If you do take advantage of my family's hospitality, though, you have to promise to stay away from the TiVo. One accidentally cancelled episode of "Project Runway" and my mom will kick you to the curb, my friend.
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