Reason 262

Dream houses. Despite the fact that it gave me nightmares and was banned from our television for almost a year, I was entranced by "Scooby-Doo" as a kid. I loved the ridiculous antics of bumbling best friends, Scooby and Shaggy, as well as Velma's superior intellect and Daphne's groovy outfit. Fred, however, didn't do a thing for me and seemed completely unnecessary except as the driver of the Mystery Machine. Aside from the characters, I was also fascinated by the various haunted buildings they explored. In one episode they crept around an old house and ended up trapped in a room where the entire floor was a trampoline. I decided then and there that when I grew up I would build a house with a trampoline floor and perhaps even walls. I also thought it would be amazing to install secret passageways throughtout my old Victorian (wraparound porch required), just like the ones in Clue, and to have a dumbwaiter running from the kitchen to whatever room happened to be above it so I could pop in and out of it like Webster, that kid adopted by the ex-NFL star and his wife. Obviously, I was influenced by 80's TV and film architecture from a very young age. With my strong affinity for bizarre houses, imagine the overwhelming glee I felt when I found out your abode, Jason, has secret passageways. I almost swooned right out of my chair. When you first toured your current home Neil Patrick Harris tagged along and, upon seeing the place, proclaimed he felt like he had walked into your brain. Well, I have a feeling my brain would be well represented by your house, too. You and I obviously think alike when it comes to odd living arrangements, which is one more reason we'll get along like gangbusters when we finally meet. Perhaps I can even sell you on the benefits of a trampoline room. Just a warning, though, if I stumble upon Scrappy-Doo while wandering around your mansion I will squash him like a bug.