Jason says "read this blog!"
Just when I'm about to sign the DNR papers for this blog something comes along and inspires me to write another post. One of these days Jason Segel will come to his senses and beg me to befriend him. I just hope he isn't waiting to see the 365th reason. It may take years.



365 Reasons Why...An Explanation

Well, hello there (said in a very sexy voice). You're looking quite lovely today. Welcome to my blog. Feel free to take off your shoes and get comfortable, maybe leave a comment or two. This started out as kind of a funny thing to do after I blew a phone conversation with Jason, but I've found I really enjoy writing every day and researching new and interesting things about my future BFF. In January I met Jason at a comedy club and the few words we shared only reinforced my belief that he and I would get along famously. As a dear friend of mine recently said, "why wouldn't he want to be friends with you - you're awesome!" Perhaps the 365 reasons in this blog may just convince Jason of what I already know to be true: separately, our awesomeness is great; combined, it may be enough to take over the world. If you want to be one of my esteemed followers, simply click on the 'follow' button toward the bottom of the page. Come on, you know you want to.



Saturday, March 27, 2010

Reason 116

Cleanliness. You know those people who wipe down the bathroom sink every morning after brushing their teeth or leave vacuum lines in their carpet or organize their closets by season and color of shirt? Well, I am not one of those people. In fact, I am fairly oblivious when it comes to keeping my home tidy. I wouldn't say I live in a pigsty, but my condo definitely looks lived in, with the stacks of unopened mail on the kitchen table, shoes strewn about the living room and the one pair of pants that, after 2 months, just can't seem to make its way off the bed into a drawer. Good thing I live alone, I guess. Unbeknowst to my friends, my housekeeping blindness benefits them because if I am hanging out at their house and they have forgotten to wipe down a counter, dust their tchotchkes or toss some dirty clothes in the hamper, it's almost guaranteed I will take no notice. In fact, when I was an assistant supervisor at a group home one of my responsibilities was making sure the teenage boys living there kept their bedrooms and common spaces relatively grime-free, and almost everyday my supervisor would walk me through the house, shaking his head with disappointment as he pointed out all of the unacceptable dirt and clutter I had missed. He just couldn't wrap his head around the fact that I was blissfully unaware of the mess. It probably didn't help that he was a smidge OCD. Jason, as my friend, you will never have to worry about cleaning up your mansion before my arrival, which means you'll have more time to knit your pet canary a sweater, rearrange the features on your Mr. Potato Head, or perfect your Electric Slide solo. Sure, cleanliness is next to godliness, but who the heck wants to be God? She has way too much on her plate, and I'm not about to complain if it's been soaking in the sink for a few days.

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